Blooming Women
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  • Happy Birthday, Blooming Women! One Year Today!
  • Blog—Maniacal Musings—Becky Lyn Rickman, Managing Editor
  • Blog—Jessica's Journey—Jessica VanVactor, Guest Contributor
  • Blog—My Armenia—Carol Rickman's Blog
  • Dealing with miscarriage
  • My Story
  • Circles
  • The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Being Single
  • 5 Stages of divorce recovery
  • The Circus is in Town
  • (You're covered with) The Fingerprints of God
  • Thunder Roared and Love Soared
  • A Period Piece
  • A sneak preview of the Gertie sequel!
  • Six Steps to Cultivate your Femininity in the Business World
  • Chore Zoning or Don't try this at home!
  • The 50 with Meredith Morse—Opera Singer
  • The 50 with Jessica VanVactor
  • Memorizing Joy
  • AT LAST! My interview with Shan White, Life Coach for women in transition
  • Questions and statements we don't care if we never, ever get asked or told again (am I right, girls?)
  • The Date
  • Moonshadow's Spirit
  • Broken Writer + Hypnotherapy = Amazing Trips
  • The "R" Word
  • The 50 with Carol Shepherd Rickman
  • Triumph During Transitions
  • A Kentucky Afternoon
  • Mothers
  • 10 things chemo taught me
  • What if . . .
  • Forgiveness—A poem
  • Mantegories (n. from the Latin; man+categories)
  • Insomnia 101
  • Blooming Bud Interview: Sierra
  • Masterful Mindsets
  • It's in the bag!
  • Important lessons for children: Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can
  • Nursery rhymes, and times, and slimes, and grimes, and crimes
  • Things I learned as a single mom
  • Sadie's Soapbox: Dating
  • The Dress
  • 8 Things That Have Surprised Me About Having a Large Family
  • The gift of longing
  • The Semicolon Project
  • Most embarrassing moments—culinary edition
  • MilitaReality—a brat's perspective
  • About those elusive wisps of thought
  • Being there
  • The Giving Mom
  • How I still haven't learned to keep my smart mouth shut!
  • If you give a mom a cookie . . .
  • Cacti and Geraniums
  • The Three Gardeners
  • Beauty is as beauty does
  • Words for Sabra
  • Arm scratching in Baltimore
  • Pornography didn't kill our love and friendship . . . I did . . . and how we got it back
  • Hardening off our little bloomers
  • The Wonderful, Magical Women of Blooming Television
  • Shake it like a Polaroid picture!
  • 25 Date Nights (that aren't dinner and a movie)
  • Hills Like White Elephants
  • Maryland Beaten Biscuits
  • The night we thought the house was exploding
  • A mysterious case of goosebumps or "What is that on the wall?"
  • Militareality—Real stories of military wives
  • Finding my metal in wood
  • Another blooming bud interview
  • Chariot of Fire
  • Secret gifts of love
  • The best prank I ever pulled was . . .
  • Connie
  • Dating and other hazards
  • Favorite childhood memories
  • When God speaks . . .
  • Zanie gets into another sticky situation
  • No-see-ums: A little useful information
  • I love my kids, but . . .
  • Meg's poem
  • Another blooming bud interview
  • Some of my favorite herbal recipes are . . .
  • I love my cat, but . . .
  • I love all creatures, but . . .
  • The thing all girls and women must see and know . . .
  • The Great Chicken Debacle
  • The Powerful Influence of Brothers
  • How I feel about blooming is . . .
  • Sometimes grandma is up—other times she is simply upside-down
  • Anyone out there as anxious as I am?
  • Some of my funniest childhood memories are . . .
  • You might be addicted to Harry Potter if . . .
  • This month's survey:
  • Another Blooming Bud interview
  • The most valuable life lesson I've learned is . . .
  • The greatest blessing to come out of the most painful thing I ever experienced was . . .
  • The most powerful influence on my life is . . .
  • The thing that could have broken our family, but didn't was . . .
  • The funniest thing that ever happened to me was . . .
  • The time my dad really surprised me was when . . .
  • NEW FEATURE: Interviews with Blooming Buds
  • ANOTHER NEW FEATURE: A survey
  • The most valuable life lesson I've ever learned is . . .
  • My most embarrassing moment was when . . .
  • What really puzzles me is . . .
  • One of the most fun days I ever had was . . .
  • The most scared I've ever been was when . . .
  • The people who have been the biggest influence on me are . . .
  • I like to relax by . . .
  • The best way to do . . .
  • My most embarrassing moment was when . . .
  • The most fun I ever had was when . . .
  • When I grow up, I want to be . . .
  • What really puzzles me is . . .
  • The most amazing bargain I ever found was . . .
  • Those annoying things kids do and what they mean
  • My shameless self-promotion
  • The thing about getting older is . . .

Arm scratching in Baltimore

By Tiffany Winn Rueckert
A beautiful analogy that sheds some insight into a worrisome situation
Please go upstairs and clean your rooms I tell them. Nothing. I say it again a little louder and add a firm “now” to the end of my plea. They crawl upstairs to their rooms as I follow behind. They slowly start to pick up clothes, stack books. I walk away. I go about my business downstairs. Minutes pass. Upstairs I hear giggling and then music.

“Are you cleaning your rooms???” I shout from downstairs.

“YES!!” they shout back.

More minutes pass and I walk upstairs. They aren’t cleaning. All three are wrestling around on the ground. I get a bit louder and turn off the music.

“Why do you not respond until I get loud and add threats?” I yell at them.

I tell them they have ten minutes to clean up their room and whatever is not done after ten minutes is going into a trash bag. The room is clean in ten minutes. Three things go into the bag. 

-----------------

I’m standing in the backyard talking to a friend. Tommy screams “Moooommmmy!” and his fingernails scratch my dry skin. I glare down and my friend says “Oh, my.” Four white claw marks span the length of my forearm.

“Why did you scratch me Tommy??”

“Because you didn’t hear me! I was asking and asking and you didn’t hear me!”

“But Tommy, you know when Mommy is having an adult conversation you need to wait until I am done”

“But remember, I am hungry.”

And then I remembered that I had told him that I would go in and make dinner when he had told me he was hungry 20 minutes earlier. I had been sidetracked when a friend stopped by and dinner was far from being done.

And then I remembered that he really hadn’t had lunch that day because mom was running errands and had thrown a few apples and crackers at him and his brothers.

He had gotten louder and was giving me a threat.

Crud.

I get it.

--------------

I do not condone arm scratching or yelling at your parents. I do not condone yelling at your kids or resorting to threats. I do not condone breaking windows, looting or throwing things at others.

I also do not condone not listening when someone is trying to ask you nicely the first, second or third time. I also do not condone not following through on what you say you are going to do. Empty promises, sidetracked resolutions.

There has been a lot of arm scratching happening in Baltimore this week. I think because I can see this dichotomy in my own life I can understand how it happens on a bigger scale, when more is at stake. Sometimes when you have heard empty promises and experience has taught you to not trust, you get firmer and you get louder. Sometimes you do things that aren’t nice.

Crud, Baltimore.

I get it.


Love Tiffany's glimpses into her busy world? Check this out:
The Giving Mom
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